Birthdays are funny. Either anticipated eagerly, or dreaded with such a heavy heart. I suppose it is the same for everyone. Some people see it as a good thing, a new year, clean slate, a marking of time and the chance to see what else life can bring in the next coming year. A friend of mine (admittedly a man whose outlook is rather cloudy at the moment) sees birthdays as yet another year in which he has failed to do what he wants so desperately. I on the other hand greet birthdays with some sadness, but also joy. It is not only the passing of another year. I am a year older, I have learnt more than this time last year, and have gained alot in that time. The sadness comes from apprehension more than anything else. The same anticipation felt at the start of the new year. It only lasts a short time, but this time, in between xmas and my birthday is always a time when my moods are very much swings and roundabouts.

Today has been splendid, spent in the most wonderful way, with the two people I love dearly (and my mother at the end of the phone). The presents were lovely (I am the lucky owner of a beautiful necklace from Jenny Vorwaller), but the most important gift I was given this year was time. The Fiancé took the day off to be with me. To spend time doing exactly what I wanted. We went out for a drive, pottered around a town, had lunch together, bought cakes (for my new birthday ritual: tea and cakes) and spent the most wonderful day together. It just served to reinforce my understanding of how lucky I am to have everyone in my life, and how nothing matters in the end but the moments and memories we create in our lives. Dinner was served, on time, and immaculately by the Fiancé; filo pastry parcels containing vegetables and ricotta cheese, laid on a bed of sweet-balsamic vinegar onion sauce. Preceded by steamed dimsum (something I've always wanted to try, but never have, until now!) and proceeded by more sweet dimsum (it really is addictive stuff, those balls of sweet pappy goodness). I have been waited on completely by my Fiancé, I hope I can make his birthday equally as great.

So, about 175,330 hours ago, I was being born in a hospital. I was, as yet, not aware of the life that I would lead, or the Great Journey that life would take me on. But boy what a journey it has been so far!